2021, 5 Months In…

The year is 2021, the month is now May. 5 months into the year. You know how most people are saying that we need a reset button for 2020 or a refund for the year as it was just almost total BS? Well, 2021 is starting to look like another loop of crazy. Well, atleast in my opinion as I’ve been dealt some horrible cards the first few months of the year. I was truly disappointed and deeply hurt because my dreams and hopes were shattered just like that. But, there is some positive out of it though. It’s like I’ve been given a second chance in the love department. LOL. This time, I’m going to choose wiser. I’m only going to let someone who is worthy and deserving of my love in.

Work has been moving forward. I’ve acquired some new clientele which is good. I have some new roles to work on. Let’s close some roles and make that money!! 😀

I can’t help but miss my Mom more recently due to my Birthday, Mother’s Day and her Birthday that’s coming up very soon. I hope that you’ve been well my Dearest Mom. Please forgive me for the tears that I’ve shed over the months. I know you wouldn’t want to see me sad but, how can I not miss your presence. We used to chat and speak to each other every other day and I love the way you used to laugh about things and nag me about things. I miss your love and caring nature.

I’m still on the fence about getting the C-19 Vaccination as there’s a few options now. To wait and get Pfizer sometime next year or to volunteer for AstraZaneca or Sinovac? Choices… I really dunno TBH. But, if that’s the only way for me to travel, I’ll have to eventually take it no matter what as Boy, I really want to fly. The last time, I flew internationally was in 2016. That was freaking long ago. Can you imagine, it’s been almost 5yrs since I last left this country? Damn!!

I’m starting to miss being able to just travel. Remember how it was Pre-C-19 Days? If you wanted to travel, all you would need is your passport and air tickets mainly. Now, you need to fill up a gazillion forms, get C-19 tested prior to your flights and follow so many freaking SOPs (Standard Operating Procedures). Will we ever go back to how it used to be? As it’s now a year plus that we’ve been having to live in this C-19 times. I think it makes many wonder and ponder this issue.

On a different note, is this a blessing in disguise that this happened or is it a curse? I think most will say the later. Well, for me I think if it wasn’t for it, I wouldn’t have seen some peoples’ true colours and I would most likely still be stuck in a hurtful relationship.

That being said, do you think this pandemic has made people drift apart by the different challenges that it brings with it or does it make people appreciate each other more and drive people closer in the process? I know that this tests relationships especially those in LDRs (Long Distance Relationships) as flying is way trickier than it used to be. If you’re in one now, how long will you be willing to wait for your partner? If it was me, my answer would be, no matter how long it will take. I will patiently wait and, I’d surely keep intouch over Videocalls, Voicecalls and Texting for sure. Thank God and the brilliant minds behind those awesome interactive apps.

How’s your 2021 been for you? I’d like to hear about it in the comments below.

XoXo, VA

The Relationship That We Deserve…

Love is many things and being in a relationship is supposed to be easy and you should not have to guess where you are going next. I want a love where we build each other up through our declaration of commitment for each other. A love that makes us continually grow to be better people together. I know that both of us can be unlovable and difficult at times. Instead of running in the other direction, let us be there for one another. I am tired of dealing with emotional unavailability and people running away when things get tough. Let us stick together through the good and the bad. I am 100% here to give what I can give for this relationship to work no matter what.

I want us to be able to have any conversation despite how random or weird it may be, where we can listen to one another without judgment. I hope we share a love where we do not need to keep score of each other’s mistakes and forgiveness is at the tip of our tongues. And when we forgive, we forget and move on from it, not holding any grudges or pulling it up during our next disagreement but instead, we discuss and resolve things together.

I want a mature kind of love, love that is always genuine, patient, and free from neediness. I want a relationship where there is a healthy amount of communication between us. If something is not going right, I want us to talk it to each other instead of about each other. I hope you know that you do not need to depend on me or anyone else to make you feel loved. I want you to grow independently, without having to need me so much that there is no room to breathe in this relationship. It is not love if we cannot have freedom from one another.

Let us be able to have the freedom to breathe in our own thoughts and feelings. I want a relationship where we are both secure enough to support each other’s dreams unconditionally. I hope that we are mature enough to fight for our love and to accept one another as who we are, not a personal preconceived ideal of how love should be.

XoXo, VA