18th Dec 2021 – A year since you left us Mom. How time has passed us by. It’s still surreal that you’re gone. I guess a huge part of me still doesn’t want to believe that it’s true. You’ve been missed dearly by everyone who were lucky enough to meet you. A kind soul that never thought twice in helping those in need, a true friend, a feisty and bubbly person and a loving, caring mother to me.
I know that you wished that I’d stop crying. Trust me, I wish I could but, the pain of knowing that you’re not around hurts a lot and it breaks me from time to time. The emotions comes in waves and when it does, it hits hard. So, please forgive me when I breakdown. It only meant that you left a huge impact on me, on many peoples’ lives.
How are things on the other side Mom? I hope that you’ve been coping well there. I always joke with Dad that you have alot of catching up with there with family and friends that left years ago. I hope that things on the other side has been good and that you’re happy. We’ll never stop missing you. I hope that you love the roses that Dad and I got for you and the Rose scented beeswax candle that I made for you.
Yes, you read it right. People and esp. You, the one who is reading this. You need to learn how to mind your own business. Someone’s personal life is what it’s meant to be – That individual’s personal life. It has nothing to do with you or anyone else. Everyone deserves to keep their private/personal lives to themselves. You need to stop being nosy. You don’t see me prying into your personal life or your life for that matter. It’s because I don’t give a rat’s ass about it. There’s much more important things in life to think about and worry about. You’re just a relative, an acquaintance, friend or worse just a stranger that’s passing through life like everyone else.
And yes, I am not afraid to speak my mind and be my true authentic self. I eat people like you up and defecate you out like today’s breakfast. You don’t have my respect as respect if earned and you clearly have not earned any from me from talking behind my back. That makes me care less about you. Correction, I never even cared about your opinion or thoughts about me from the start. I’m not like you, a people’s pleaser that crave for attention and approval from others. I live my life the way I want to and desire. I won’t let society o social norms dictate my life as my life is my life. I’m not a public forum for people to voice out things.
The fact that you went behind my back and said that I’m suicidal baffles me. Because that’s just ridiculous to me. I’ve been through my life with it’s ups and downs just like anyone else’s and I still feel La Bella Vita… Life is freaking beautiful and since we’re only given one chance unless you’re a Buddhist you’ll believe in reincarnation, I plan to enjoy what’s given to me. In fact every inch of it. I will live my life to the fullest doing what I enjoy and do best.
So, nice try. I don’t care what you or you think about me. *points fingers at you reading this. If I did, I wouldn’t have the inks that I have just because society will stereotype me as a “bad person” or Yakuza because of my choices.
So, my point is – Just because your life isn’t as interesting as mine. Why is that? Well, it’s your own doing for living a dull life that my life caught your interest and you got obsessed. I feel sorry for you that you hide behind other’s people life who’s out there living their dreams and doing things in their life. Mind Your Own Business. Buzz off!! STOP being such a prude and rude…
I think I can call myself a Podcaster right since I’ve done 3 episodes thus far with my Cohost, Terry? We did 1 episode each week for 3 weeks straight and we took a week break and then resume with Episode 4 last weekend. We have discussed:
- Does living apart keeps couples together?
- Why does some relationships ends and others last a lifetime?
- Why younger guys prefer dating older women?
- FWB. Good Idea? Does It Work? Is It For You?
The first 2 weeks was definitely a challenge as we experienced so many different technical issues. From echoes, video not working to even no sound. We even had to redo Episode 2 when Terry wasn’t happy with the outcome of the video/podcast. This is what it’s like working with a perfectionist. I know it very well as I myself am a perfectionist too but recent years, I’ve trained myself to just let things be as life’s not perfect and I just don’t like being stressed out.
Doing The Vault Podcast has gave me a new experience and it’s definitely been a new experience. I actually look forward to every Saturday, 10pm Malaysia time and 10am, New York as we get to talk and discuss our experiences and Point Of Views (POV) over random things. I can’t wait till Terry and I are finally in the same city so that we can meet in person and also do the Podcast across from each other. I can only imagine how much more fun it will be when that happens.
People need to learn to stop playing games. It’s just not nice and it can be hurtful. They may think that it’s fun to them because they are not on the receiving end of things. Truth be told, it can really hurt and cause emotional damage or mental illness in the long run. Imagine if you’re being played, do you think you would like it?
This games can be as subtle like saying one thing, one day and going back on your words on another day. People might have cleared their schedules just to accommodate you in their plans. So, for a person to just change plans like changing underwear is a horrible thing to do unless there’s an emergency.
People really need to learn to treat others the way that they would like to be treated in return. At least, I have the decency to practice that on a daily basis. I hate hurting people because I’ve been on the receiving end many times in the past. Trust me when I say, it’s not pleasant and it really sucks. People’s feelings are fragile and once the damage has been done, sometimes you can’t reverse or take it back.