Failure..

Why do we sometimes feel like we’ve failed? I think everyone experiences feeling like a failure from time to time or at least once in their lifetime. We feel like we’ve failed when we set goals for ourselves and we miss the mark. Be it by a lil or a lot. It can be at anything and at anytime. I think we feel it when we stop and ponder about things or where we are in our lives.

Cartier Rings

On the other hand, if we don’t set any goals or expectations, we wouldn’t be able to fail right? That being said, setting goals in life is important as it plays a huge part in giving us the push that we need and something to look forward to, to achieve. Without something to look forward to, we will eventually lose our purpose and ourselves. Life would be mundane, dull and that’s when most people give up trying.

But, why is it that when a marriage fails, you can’t help but feel like a failure? For me, I had thoughts that I failed when my marriage ended months ago. I felt that way because I wanted to be married once in my lifetime and I wanted to make things work no matter how hard or difficult it may have turned out. I was very patient when things were bad. I didn’t budge or even thought of leaving, not even once. That being said when he threw the towel in, it hurt and it made me feel that whatever I’ve done or haven’t done, well it felt that it just wasn’t enough. Weeks after we ended, I stopped blaming myself and came to the conclusion that we just weren’t right for each other despite how much we once loved each other. We made sacrifices for each other so that can only meant we did truly love one another right?

I think we should stop feeling like failures when things don’t work out the way we envision them because things doesn’t go as plan most of the time anyway. We need to learn to accept things as they come. Learn to be alright with things at the end of the day. So, maybe the key is to have acceptance. Accept that things can go south sometimes and that it will be alright nevertheless. Maybe even take it as a blessing because if something was meant for you, it would workout in it’s own way. We need to learn to be less tough on ourselves from time to time as the world and expectations we set can sometimes get overwhelming.

XoXo, VA

Passion And What It Feels Like…

You know you’re passionate about what you do when you get excited to wake up each morning and start your day. When you feel that there isn’t enough hours in a day to do what you love doing, that’s also a sign that you’re truly passionate about it. Sometimes to a point where money isn’t a huge factor just because you enjoy and love what you do. I wish everyone could feel that way about what they do each day because it makes life more enjoyable and fun. Though not many are that lucky as some of us have to hustle to make ends meet.

I first felt this deep passion about my job in 2013 when I first had my taste of Recruitment. I truly enjoyed picking up the phone and reaching out to candidates. I work through my off days and holidays because I truly enjoyed working and I just didn’t want to stop. I remember later that year, I had to deal with my most painful breakup ever as well. I was in love and I had so much hope to a point I was ready to leave the country that I called home to start a new journey in a foreign one. That actually lead me to try recruitment when I got headhunted earlier that year because of the connection the company had with a sister company in Denmark. It actually felt like things were meant to be or so I thought.

Well, 8 years later, I’m still in Recruitment. Am I still passionate about it? I am. Also, the ex and I are still Text Friends despite it having been years since our relationship ended. We’ve been cordial with each other. I know many feel uncomfortable talking to an ex. For me, I think if you’ve had closure and have no lingering feelings anymore, it’s alright. I’m a lil sad that he still haven’t found a new gf since we last dated. According to him, I’ve set the bar pretty high. I dunno whether to feel sad for him or happy knowing that I have left such an impact after so many years. 😛

XoXo, VA